True Ancestor's Brain Teasers and Logic Puzzles

Kimmie-chan · Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 6:03 am Post subject:

[quote="xenocrisis0153

Long_Gun · Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 7:12 pm Post subject:

YEY! more brain teasers!

Lateral Thinking # 10

Rag_gurl is a truck driver. She is asked to drive the truck to virginia, several hours later when she gets there, she find herself swamped with guys, drooling over her. She then decides to stay and party all through the night, after she is done, she starts driveing again, only to fall asleep at the wheel, landing in a ditch and haveing her truck explode on contact. fire........

Brain bender #10

split second timeing? bah, i cant think today

Quicky Logic # 22

TAXES! EVIL CONIVEING TAXES! THEY MUST DIE!!!! ALL MUST DIE!!!!!

QL #23

She was walking her dog....and along the way, he did his bisness on the policemans car.

QL # 24

the fisherman is really his daughter....who he kicked outa his house for being a harlet, therefore she didnt get any money, and her younger brother got her share

and now ima try out for the orginal spam award, and ima try to make true laugh. (please note, this tolk me 2 hours to do. due to cussing its marked in spoiler, for thouse that cant handle it)

You know what pisses me off? You know, when you're having a conversation with someone, and for some reason, you get on a particular topic. In this case, let's say... the topic is... nuts. Don't you hate how the other person usually has to make some dumbass sexual comment creating some kind of lame-ass pun based on your legitimate topic of conversation? Let's say you say something like "I'm not sure I like those nuts, they leave a weird taste in my mouth." Then the other person, in usual dumb ass fashion, just has to say something like "Uhh, you don't like the nuts in your mouth? Hehehe." And then he or she giggles like an idiot for a half hour because they think they made a clever joke out of your topic of conversation. These people need to be killed! I'm sick and tired of people warping simple topics into something perverted. And God forbid if you're a woman who gets caught up in some kind of twisted wordplay like this. Before you know it, everyone at school or work is getting on your back because you made a comment about a large ball. It's unnecessary, it's stupid, and it just shows that you're thinking with your sexual organs rather than your brain. This being the case, someone should glue your mouth to your butt, so they may illustrate the fact that you truly, indeed, suck ass.

Next topic; drunk people! You know, the type of asshole who always has to get shitfaced on the weekend and go staggering around, patting you on the back like you're his best friend, when all you really want him to do is get in his car and drive home recklessly. I'm sick and tired of some incoherent asshole who smells like a case of malt liquor all of a sudden talking about the philosophy of life while trying to pick up some woman at a bar. Nice. And what's worse, those fucking dolts who go around and actually tell you how fucked up they got the night before; like they deserve some type of award for falling face first into a patch of tomatoes in your backyard at four AM in the morning. And don't forget, [mocking voice] "friends don't let friends drive drunk."[/mocking voice] Screw that! As far as I'm concerned, give 'em the keys rev up the engine, and let 'em go sailing home with a bottle of taquila in their lap. One of three things will happen. Number 1: The cops will pull them over and end up having to beat the shit out of them, just because this fucker is in a drunken rage and refuses to turn off Neil Diamond's "They're Coming to America".
Number 2: They'll wrap themselves around a telephone pole and either be killed or paralyzed. Cruel, you say? Well, so is inflicting your drunken stupidity on the rest of the world, so be ready to pay the consequences, Asshole.
Scenario number 3, my least favorite: They make it home okay and pass out on the lawn with their motor running, while the radio is blasting some dumbass metal song from the mid-80's that no one wants to hear anymore. But at least it gives 'em a chance to try again next week.

So if you're a drunken moron or an idiot who has to manipulate legitimate conversations to get a cheap thrill for your libido, please feel free to get together with one another on the weekends, drive around drunk, make all the twisted sexual comments you like. And I'll just watch from the local diner window as they scrape your body off the pavement with a fucking spatula. Get out of our fucking lives, your moronic assholes. Your existence is useless, and you're dragging down the collective intelligence of humanity. [mocking voice] Don't like what I have to say? [/mocking voice] Here's the keys and a bottle of Crack Daniels. I'll see you tomorrow. But hopefully not.

You will all feel the wrath of my nuts! I SWEAR!

(im done now...and im glad i got that outa my system)
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Who said the dead wouldnt rise again?!?

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killeraargh · tohoshinki fangirl Joined: Mar 08, 2005 Posts: 4317

You know what's really spam?

killeraargh · tohoshinki fangirl Joined: Mar 08, 2005 Posts: 4317

P.S. > It's not this.

xenocrisis0153 · Posted: Fri Nov 10, 2006 1:11 am Post subject:

TrueAncestor · Posted: Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:23 pm Post subject:

Well done on the spamming people. But you have yet to make me crack a smile. Frowny face. So Im gonna run for the spamming award this time. Watch me go.

Edit (guess who): Mwahahahaha!!!! Or NOT! Wink

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jk123 · Posted: Sat Nov 11, 2006 11:28 pm Post subject:

i personally hate puzzles, but i like... nvm

MrLion · newbie! Joined: Nov 11, 2006 Posts: 47

Nothing wrong with puzzles, they make you think...that is what humanity lacks nowadays.
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Long_Gun · Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 3:51 pm Post subject:

true>>u might wanna stop offerin the Spam award. i think people are takeing it as an ok to spam this tread outa exsitence.
_________________
Who said the dead wouldnt rise again?!?

I'LL BE BACK~

TrueAncestor · Posted: Mon Nov 13, 2006 12:34 am Post subject:

WOOOOO thanks to the "mysterious" person who got rid of my accursed spam. Crying or Very sad

I am eternally in your debt. ...............................what the hell was I thinking...... Laughing

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Miku Miku!!
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MrLion · newbie! Joined: Nov 11, 2006 Posts: 47

I know what you were thinking but refuse to state it here. LEEEROYYYYY JENKIIIIIINNSSS
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Xristyan · Posted: Mon Nov 13, 2006 2:42 am Post subject:

TrueAncestor · Posted: Mon Nov 13, 2006 2:46 am Post subject:

Long_Gun · Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2006 3:14 pm Post subject:

woooo! new update! new update! where is it? where is it? *starts paceing around* i cant wait!
_________________
Who said the dead wouldnt rise again?!?

I'LL BE BACK~

TrueAncestor · Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2006 9:00 pm Post subject:

Gah. No small talk. On with the show. Very Happy

"Make True Ancestor Laugh Award" goes to......xenocrisis0153 and Long_Gun, xenocrisis0153 for his awesome awesome hilarious answer to Quick Logic # 22. Laughing