Jokes so bad they'll make your head explode!!

du5k · A-Source Staff Joined: Nov 05, 2005 Posts: 6357

Why does a bunch of cars stop in the middle of the road, which led to a truck crash into it, which then exploded, creating a crater in the middle of the road?

Because a chicken is crossing the road, dragging a dead baby with it and stapled to a dead monkey

TheLoneBrit101 · Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 3:41 pm Post subject:

What's black and jumps up and down?
A baby in a toaster

Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To join his 'flat' friend

Kimmie-chan · Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 8:02 pm Post subject:

Why did the orange stop halfway up the hill?

Because it ran out of juice

Laughing

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TheLoneBrit101 · Posted: Mon Jan 29, 2007 5:47 pm Post subject:

Why do seaguls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over bays they'd be bagels

Fission2 · Posted: Tue Jan 30, 2007 8:38 pm Post subject:

what's the opposite of 69?

69.

du5k · A-Source Staff Joined: Nov 05, 2005 Posts: 6357

The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was in charge. Each organ took a turn to speak up:

Brain: I should be in charge because I run all body functions.

Blood: I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.

Stomach: I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.

Legs: I should be in charge because I take the brain where it wants to go.

Eyes: I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.

Asshole: I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.

All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad.

To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.

Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief
Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly
Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable
Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred
Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body
Day 6 -The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.

*MORAL OF THE STORY: NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE "ASSHOLE" THAT IS IN CHARGE.*

TrueAncestor · Posted: Mon Feb 05, 2007 5:56 pm Post subject:

I personally havent heard any that are just horrible.....but here are some bad jokes lol.

How do you know policemen are strong?
Because they can hold up traffic.

Where do bees wait for the bus?
At the Buzz stop.

God just typing those was painful...
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du5k · A-Source Staff Joined: Nov 05, 2005 Posts: 6357

I remembered a really old and really bad one;

What won't you want to be served on dinner?

A tennis ball

TheLoneBrit101 · Posted: Thu Feb 08, 2007 2:00 pm Post subject:

What gets washed up on small beaches?
microwaves

du5k · A-Source Staff Joined: Nov 05, 2005 Posts: 6357

Can we change this into a random joke thread?

You are sitting under a tree. An apple and a watermelon drops on your head. Which one hurts more?

Neither. It's your head that hurts.

Doomsought · Posted: Wed Apr 11, 2007 8:39 pm Post subject:

[img:465:660:5a449512ec]http://i112.photobucket.com/albums/n195/doomsought/sh.jpg[/img:5a449512ec]
but it is true; isn't it?
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atikiN · Posted: Wed Apr 11, 2007 10:37 pm Post subject:

Mom: You're adopted!

Yeah, i didn't find it funny either.

xenon10 · Posted: Mon Apr 16, 2007 9:40 am Post subject:

du5k · A-Source Staff Joined: Nov 05, 2005 Posts: 6357

Haha, I remember another one from white chicks.

kithus · newbie! Joined: Apr 17, 2007 Posts: 8

How do you make Holy Water?

You take water, and then boil the hell out of it

This is a really old joke, and I am kinda surprised why no one thought of it. Anyway here goes nothing.

Why is 10 afraid of 7?

Because 7, 8, 9, and 10's next.